Why telling women they don’t have Imposter Syndrome is harmful
Dismissing women’s Imposter Syndrome as “not real” or “only oppression” invalidates genuine self-doubt, fear of being exposed, and performance anxiety. This well-intended dismissal gaslights women by denying their psychological reality and removing access to tools that help them heal, grow, and lead with confidence.
As a psychologist who has written and spoken about Imposter Syndrome for years, I’ve watched a wave of takes urging us to “stop telling women they have Imposter Syndrome.” While these perspectives raise essential points about bias and inequity, they risk erasing the lived experience of countless women who feel like frauds despite a track record of success. The more accurate—and helpful—truth is this: oppression can influence Imposter Syndrome, but it does not cause it by itself. Ignoring that distinction deprives women of language, tools, and supportive community.
What Imposter Syndrome Really Is—and Isn’t
A Phenomenon, Not a Diagnosis
Imposter Syndrome isn’t a medical diagnosis. Decades ago, psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes introduced the term Imposter Phenomenon to describe a pattern of thoughts and feelings common among high achievers—without pathologizing them. Over time, the shorthand “syndrome” stuck in popular culture, but the phenomenon remains a pattern of cognition and emotion, not a disorder in the DSM or ICD.
The Core Experience
At its core, Imposter Syndrome is the persistent belief that your success is undeserved. You may attribute achievements to luck, timing, or others’ mistakes instead of your competence. Common signs include:
- Feeling like a fraud despite evidence of success
- Overworking or procrastinating to manage performance anxiety
- Difficulty internalizing accomplishments
- Avoiding stretch opportunities for fear of being “found out”
Many people—women and men—experience these patterns at some point. That doesn’t make it universal, and it certainly doesn’t make anyone “broken.” It means we need accurate understanding and effective tools.
Where the Misunderstanding Comes From
A common reframing suggests Imposter Syndrome is simply a reaction to discrimination. While workplace bias can trigger or intensify imposter feelings, it is rarely the origin story. For many, the groundwork is laid in earlier life.
The Role of Early Experiences
Research and clinical observation point to childhood dynamics that shape imposter thinking:
- Perfectionistic or highly critical family environments
- Conditional approval and inconsistent praise
- Internalized pressure to achieve as proof of worth
- Being the “responsible one,” caretaker, or peacemaker early on
These experiences contribute to the inner narrative—“I’m only valuable when I’m perfect”—long before a person encounters workplace bias.
Oppression and Imposter Syndrome: Intertwined—but Distinct
It’s crucial to recognize a “double impact.” Internally, imposter thoughts whisper, “You don’t belong.” Externally, inequitable systems can echo that message through microaggressions, pay gaps, and lack of representation. Together, they reinforce one another and make the experience more intense. But conflating them robs women of agency—the ability to build skills that reduce imposter thoughts even as we fight to change the system.
Why Gaslighting Women Makes Things Worse
When people insist that Imposter Syndrome “isn’t real” or is “just oppression,” they inadvertently gaslight women who are bravely naming their struggle. Gaslighting here means invalidating an inner experience—telling someone that what they feel isn’t real or relevant. For many women, learning about Imposter Syndrome is a liberation moment: finally having language for their emotions and a path forward. Dismissing it shuts the door to support.
The Psychological Cost of Denial
- Delaying or avoiding help and therapy
- Shame for “struggling at all” despite success
- Erosion of self-trust and intuition
- Compounded anxiety and burnout over time
Healing Requires Both Systemic and Personal Work
What Leaders and Organizations Must Do
- Audit pay equity and promotion pipelines regularly
- Build inclusive sponsorship and mentoring programs
- Hold managers accountable for bias and microaggressions
- Normalize psychological safety—invite dissent, celebrate learning
What Individuals Can Do (Without Waiting for the System to Change)
Personal empowerment is not about “fixing” women; it’s about equipping them with tools to thrive in imperfect systems. Structured approaches like the 3C’s Model—Challenge, Connect, Celebrate—help people reframe thoughts, build supportive communities, and internalize wins.
- Challenge: Catch all-or-nothing thinking; replace it with balanced evidence.
- Connect: Cultivate mentors, peers, and affinity groups that normalize growth.
- Celebrate: Document achievements; practice receiving praise without deflection.
The Agency to Reclaim Your Confidence
In work with hundreds of high-achieving women, naming Imposter Syndrome is often the turning point. People begin noticing their patterns, saying yes to stretch roles, and celebrating progress. They also learn to pace effort—reducing overwork and self-sabotage that once managed anxiety but drained energy.
For a compassionate deep dive into this healing mindset, see:
Vulnerability and Compassion Are Key Practices to Combating Imposter Syndrome.
The Real Message: Both/And Thinking
We can fight inequity and support individuals. Telling women to ignore self-doubt until the world becomes fair is unrealistic—and unfair. Addressing Imposter Syndrome is about equipping people with tools to thrive while we continue the urgent work of culture change.
For practical strategies to avoid the exhaustion loop that can accompany imposter thoughts, explore:
Burnout, Imposter Syndrome & Beating the Cycle.
Moving Forward—With Compassion and Clarity
Let’s stop gaslighting women when they say they’re struggling with Imposter Syndrome. Let’s listen, validate, and support them in building confidence and agency. Because when women reclaim self-belief, they transform workplaces, families, and communities.
Ready to build practical confidence?
Start with the 3C’s Model and a short reflection practice. Then schedule one conversation with a trusted mentor to reality-check your inner critic this week.
Learn the 3C’s Model
Frequently Asked Questions
Is Imposter Syndrome only a women’s issue?
No. While women may report it more openly, Imposter Syndrome affects all genders and identities. Social expectations can intensify its impact on women and marginalized groups.
Can systemic bias cause Imposter Syndrome?
Bias and discrimination can trigger or amplify imposter thoughts, but family dynamics and early experiences often create the initial cognitive patterns.
How can women start overcoming Imposter Syndrome?
Name it, reframe it, and get support. Use structured approaches like the 3C’s Model (Challenge, Connect, Celebrate), cultivate mentoring relationships, and practice receiving praise.
What’s wrong with denying Imposter Syndrome?
It invalidates lived experience, discourages help-seeking, and removes access to tools that rebuild confidence and agency.

About Lisa Orbé-Austin, PhD
Lisa Orbé-Austin is a licensed psychologist, executive coach, and co-author of Own Your Greatness, Your Unstoppable Greatness, and Your Child’s Greatness. A two-time LinkedIn Top Voice and a Thinkers50 Top 50 Coach, she helps high-achieving professionals overcome Imposter Syndrome, build confidence, and lead with purpose.
Dynamic Transitions Psychological Consulting LLP